March 03, 2010

Running On Empty



What do you do when you run on empty?  I'm not talking about your vehicle running out of gas.  I mean when you are emotionally and spiritually exhausted.  What do you do?  What has helped you?

This past weekend has been difficult for my family and I because a close friend of ours died.  It was a hard thing to accept.  He was a Christian so I know we will see him again but that doesn't mean that his passing doesn't hurt.  He will be missed, especially by his wife who had no children and is now completely alone in this world.

We didn't hear about his passing until three days later.  But the strangest thing is that the day he died I had been feeling very nostalgic.  So I found my childhood photo album and started flipping through captured memories and I paused at a photo of this dear couple.  It was taken many years back.  They were holding me between themselves.  I was a year old. Strange how the heart can sense things we aren't aware of at the time.

So while my family and I reeled from the loss of our friend I received another phone call from a close friend of mine who is like the sister I never had.  She was on her way up from the south to visit her only living grandparent who was dying in the hospital.  The news came as a shock to my friend because her grandmother was perfectly healthy until just a few weeks ago.  And to top things off my friend is getting married next month and had been hoping her grandmother would be present.

So she came to spend a few nights with me and I had to put aside my grief and comfort her.  Now that my friend has left, staying with family and waiting for her grandmother to die, I am left to pick up my own grief.  And I'm tired.  I feel drained.  And I suppose that's natural.  Grief has a strange way of pulling at our reserves.

I find at times its difficult to focus on work and I'm taking naps.  I never take naps.  Oh well.  This too shall pass.  I do hope that all of you are having a better week.  God is good even when life is not.  His love and his faithfulness endures forever.

7 comments:

Andrea said...

It is all normal. Each of us grieve differently...there is NO right or wrong way. It is very exhausting. Keep clinging to your Heavenly Father. He will see you through...I promise!
Blessings, hugs, and prayers,
andrea

Lone Grey Squirrel said...

Dear Sincerity,
I am sorry that you are going through this time of sorrow and grief. I thought that I could share these two verses with you.

"Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words."
(Rom 8:26; English Standard Version)

"Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep."
(Rom 12 : 15; English Standard Version)

When we are running on empty (and I have been there too), then find peace in surrendering it to the Holy Spirit and He will intercede for us, even if it is beyond words to express what we want and need.

While it is natural that you grieve for the loss of your friend, the man's wife must be experiencing it even more acutely .... the loss and the loneliness. Turn your grief into something positive by doing something for his widow. Even if it is only to offer a shoulder to cry on. You will not only honor him but help the one that he loved most on earth. We can do no better.

RHYTHM AND RHYME said...

Nearly 12 years ago my dear mother passed away I was heartbroken although at 86 yrs old it was a good age but she was my mum, 3 days later I was told my husband had terminal brain cancer he too pased away 2 months later, I was devastated, I lived on auto pilot for years, I felt terribly alone although I had three children who it seemed decided to make me a grandmother I just could not cope.
Then I bought some self help books along with cds and over a few months I felt different, you see I had to accept what life dealt me and until I could accept the situation I couldn't get on with my own life. I still miss mum and my husband but I think of all the good memories we shared and it do help.

I am sorry for your loss, we all grieve differently and there is no time limit. God Bless you I know you will feel better but it do take time.

Take care.
Yvonne.

Sincerity said...

Andrea: Thank you for your kind words. Thank you too for the blessings and hugs.

Mr. LGS: Those verses are beautiful. Thank you for sharing them and reminding me of God's promises. Unfortunately our friend's wife lives far away. But I do believe your advice is excellent and I am praying for her.

Yvonne: I can't even fathom what level of pain you have suffered. It is amazing to me how God has been sustaining you all this time. May He be glorified in your life. And thank you for your honest and sincere encouragement.

Lone Grey Squirrel said...

I am glad if it has been encouraging and helpful.

Amrita said...

sorry hear about your loss. May God comfort you

Sincerity said...

Amrita: Thank you so much. May God bless you for offering encouragement.