Pulling Up Heart Weeds

It hit me suddenly.  It robbed me of my happiness.  It hovered like a thick storm cloud in my mind.  That bitter, stubborn root that wouldn't come out.  And the harder I pulled the deeper it seemed to go.

Envy.  Not necessarily for any physical possession someone else had but for the surplus of success they experienced.  To see it happen to people who don't care about living a moral life, to see it happen to people who have never trusted God for anything... it hit a sore spot in my heart.

Psalm 73:3 " For I envied the proud when I saw them prosper despite their wickedness." 

I've witnessed people attain everything they ever wanted even when they lived in a way that was so contrary to God's will.  Some of these individuals called themselves Christians and yet they didn't harbor any guilt and continued living as they wished, suffering no consequences.

Which taught me two things:

1. It is possible that some people who think they are Christians really are not.

2. Just because someone knows Christ as their savior doesn't mean they will choose to resist
    the natural darkness in their own heart.

We know envy is wrong.  Why should anyone envy anyone for anything?  No two people are exactly alike.  That makes life beautiful and fascinating!

I hate envy and what it does to people. I hate that, at times, I find it in my own heart.  Because it means that deep down inside I'm not trusting God with my life.  Because having envy means that I'm comparing myself to others around me.  That is something God never does to any of us!

God doesn't compare me to you or you to the person next to you.  God compares us to Himself.  And if we accept Jesus as our savior then we are beautiful and desirable to Him.  We don't have to try and have or be anything more than what we already are!  And I think at times this is the most difficult thing to understand.

Perhaps part of the problem is that in our society we define success as the people who make the most money, have the highest degrees, have the most ideal spouses, and the most talented kids.  If what we have doesn't equal the best of the next person then we are lesser than them.  

This is the way the world thinks.  This is the way of the natural heart.  But God urges us to see the world and ourselves through His eyes, through His heart.  It shouldn't matter what anyone else has but what you and I do with what God has given us.

So why do we compare ourselves to others?  Why do we question our self worth? Why do the wicked prosper?  

I know what I think but I would love to hear what your thoughts are on the subject.  Please feel free to share in the comments.

God bless you as you continue to seek His will in your life.









 

Gifts, Blossoms, and Well Wishes

So as the weeks have flown by I realized that school will be out soon.  My duties as professor at a local college will be completed by the end of this week. 

And as the weeks have become busier and busier I didn't have much time to reflect on the passing of my cat, Mozart.  But God has a way of encouraging us as we need it best.  Friends began sending me random messages of encouragement.  Several of you readers were very kind in encouraging me too. And just a few days ago a card arrived in the mail.  It was from several sweet ladies at the veterinarian clinic Mozart used to visit.

Inside the words were so kind and honest.  Everyone at the clinic loved my cat and so I knew their words were sincere.  It really cheered me up.  Well, as much as condolences can cheer one up.

That same evening I had to perform in a concert and I hadn't even had time to invite any friends.  But God put it on the mind of a special friend to find out when my performances were scheduled.  She greeted me afterwards with fresh flowers! I was so surprised.  And they smelled wonderful.  It was another encouragement to me.

And then, driving home from work the other day it seemed as if all the flowering trees in my neighborhood conspired to bloom at the same time.  There was so much color!  And there were so many flowers that their petals were blanketing the streets.  It was gorgeous!  

Once my days are little more relaxed I hope to take a leisurely walk around my neighborhood and photograph all the beautiful colors.

Meanwhile, indoors has been peaceful at home.  Our two cats, Haydn and Salieri, have finally gottten neutered and are the sweetest and cuddliest cats around.  For those of you who remember, Haydn ( the one with the spots) showed up on our back porch steps wailing and crying to come in when he was only a few weeks old.

To this day we don't know how he found us.  We still believe God led him to our door.  He knew we would need healthy, happy cats for the day Mozart would be departing.

Salieri, Sali as we affectionately call him,  speaks a lot.  It almost seems like he tries to sing whenever he sees any of us.  He is the first to greet us in the mornings and has become very tame.

So... life goes on.  Praise the Lord!  In our home there is new life.  All around our home there is new life.  Spring is certainly a season of rebirth.